One of the first feelings people have when they seek elderly care services is guilt. Many reasons for this guilt exist, and they are completely warranted. However, it’s important to understand that guilt isn’t a reason to not seek elderly care for your older loved one.
Dealing with the Guilt
The root of the guilt you feel is from love you have for this person. You don’t want them to feel as though you do not love or care for them because you are not the one providing the help they need.
You may think, “Well, actions speak louder than words.” This is true, but providing the services isn’t the only action that will show how much you love and care for that person. Seeking services is also an action and often is the best course of action.
This is why the first way to deal with the guilt is by looking at seeking elderly care differently.
Change Your Perspective
When a mother has a baby and works outside of the home, child care services are often used to help. Elderly care services is the same thing. Not seeking help could be neglectful, which actually would show you don’t love or care for your older loved one.
Perspective can make situations much easier to handle. You may need to remind yourself constantly until you believe it.
Another perspective to consider is reminding yourself that this isn’t the only thing your older loved one is receiving. Just because elderly care services are being used, it doesn’t mean you aren’t going to spend time with them and help them in other ways.
Providing assistance outside of services is one way you can help yourself see that you are providing MORE than what your loved one needs. This can make you and your loved one much happier.
Changing your perspective isn’t the only way to deal with your guilt. Changing the perspective of your older loved one will help you as well. When your loved one feels good about elderly care services, you will too.
Some ways to help your older loved one see that these services are good for him or her is to point out what would happen if they were not available. Certainly that would be a challenging conversation and unpleasant considerations may arise. But this may open your loved one’s eyes and mind, which can be a great relief for you.
You may also be able to put things in a better light by explaining that just like they may have elicited services for you growing up, you are now doing the same. This may help him or her see this is a necessary thing to do since you have other obligations.
ElderCare Connections for Elderly Care Help
ElderCare Connections offers senior placement services to help people going through the feelings you’re having right now. We can help you get through this difficult time with suggestions on how to deal with the situation, as well as provide referrals for services. Sometimes, learning more about the services can help you understand this isn’t a lack of love, but actually an act of love.
You can learn more about this difficult time in our FREE eBook available here.